To The Bitter End, Part 6

It Was Just Supposed To Be a Routine Checkup

It Was Just Supposed To Be a Routine Checkup

I was in a hurry. I was covering a shift for a co-worker of mine, so I’d have to make it to my doctor’s appointment in time and then go straight from there to work. Walking out to my car, I noticed the birds chirping and the roses blooming. I breathed deeply and smiled when I got in my car and rolled down the windows. I slipped my Placebo cd in and sang along with Lady of the Flowers.

Walking into the clinic I noticed just how packed it was and my mood dipped, but just a fraction. I signed my name on the paper attached to the clipboard and took a seat in a far corner. Lucky for me, I’d brought along a book by my favorite writer, Anne Rice..

It seemed hardly any time had passed at all before a woman opened the double doors and called out my name. “Adoria Eu-  uh….”  I stood and tucked my book back into my tote bag. “That’s me.”  The woman held the doors open wide for me and I walked to the room she pointed at with an index finger..
Later on, at the clinic
  “Adoria, how are you feeling this morning?”  “Great, Doctor Hendley, thanks.” I smiled and he slid the rolling chair in front of me and sat down. “Glad to hear it,” Doctor Hendley said. He coughed into the palm of his hand and cleared his throat. “Adoria, I need to ask you a few questions if that’s alright.”  I nodded my head and smiled politely. “Sure, go ahead.”  “Adoria, have you had any head aches..or maybe blurred vision? Anything like that?”  I blinked and slowly shook my head. “, not that I can recall.”  Now it was his turn to nod. He did so and then looked down at his shoes. I looked down at his shoes, too. “Is there something you should be telling me?” My voice came out raspy and uneven.  “Adoria, I don’t want to worry you. Perhaps I’ll go over things again, and maybe even send some things off to the lab…How about I have someone get a hold of you tomorrow? Can you come back in then?”  “Doc, you cant just leave me hangin’ here..”  “No, Adoria, that’s not my intention at all. Just give me a day, a full day, to look this over and maybe get someone to look it over with me..”  Reluctantly, I agreed.

   “Have a nice day!” the woman at the front desk shouted out to me as I turned the knob at the front door of the clinic. I threw a smile over my shoulder and noticed when my sweaty hand couldn’t get a grip on the handle. I used both hands to open the door and walked back to my car with legs that quivered like jelly.


Yucky Ibbie with ZefWork that day was exhausting and I couldn’t get the visit with my doctor out of my mind. It didn’t make it any better that we got a new nurse and she happened to spill the contents of a used bed pan all over the front of my shirt…To top it all off, I came home to Zef and Ibbie doing a snazzy little dance number when I stepped through the door..Just great..  Shoulders slumped, I sulked to my room.

followedI heard Ibbie and Zef’s footfalls directly behind me as I trudged up to my room. Akemi was at her desk, probably doing some late night work.

swappin spitBefore closing my bedroom door I looked out into the hall and saw Ibbie in Zef’s arms. They were kissing when I slammed the door and threw myself onto my bed. I threw the covers over my head and cried into my pillow..

When Did You Stop Loving Me?

When Did You Stop Loving Me?

Only a week later I’d had multiple x-rays and various tests done..Things weren’t looking good, and I hadn’t said a word to anyone about it, not even my friend Akemi..I was still having a hard time accepting it all..One night after having a few drinks by myself at the local lounge I decided to take a walk  through the park and clear my head. With my head down and tears in my eyes, I didn’t notice the figure I was passing by..not at first..Not until the wind carried his smell to my nose-a unique smell I knew as his own. I lifted my head, my arms falling to my sides. Out of the corner of my eye I saw him pause. wait!I continued to watch him without turning in his direction as he rushed past me, obviously intent on leaving quickly.  I stood there, still as a statue, and then I heard him call my name. My arms flung out as I turned swiftly to face him.

Zefania ran to stand in front of me. For an awkward minute or two, he just stood there, staring at me.. “What?” I asked, rolling my eyes.


That got Zef laughing.  “Do you always have to roll your eyes like that? It makes you look so goofy.”  I laughed so hard I snorted and,  embarrassed, I covered my mouth and nose with the palm of my hand while Zef laughed even harder. I giggled, like I always used to when Zef was around, and a pensive and ethereal look passed over his features and then was gone.   “Day, I’ve missed you, you know.”  “And I’ve missed you..” I responded. “Day, what happened to us? We were best friends..and now, now we don’t even speak to each other anymore.”  “That’s not my fault and you know it,Zef. You chose for things to be this way, not me.”  “Hey, hey, let’s not play the blame game.”  “Well, you asked a question, and I was just answering it.”   “Look, I don’t wanna fight with you, Day’Lee..I just want us to be friends again. Is that so much to ask?”  All the warm, bubbly feelings disappeared as I looked into Zefania’s eyes. “You want to be my FRIEND?!?! Oh yeah? Well where have you been all this time, huh? Do you have ANY clue what I’ve been going through?”  I slapped my forehead and sarcastically answered my question: “No, of COURSE you don’t! And why? Cuz you’ve been too busy playing footsie with Ibbie! I’m sick, Zef! I mean, I’m really sick! And you left me here to fight this on my own! And do you know what I’ve just been DYING to ask you, through it all? I’ve just been wanting to know…Zef..When did you stop loving me?!”    Zef had looked like he was about to say something..Now he just looked flabbergasted.  “What?” he asked.  “No, you know what, just forget it, because the last thing I want is for the only emotion you ever feel for me to be pity.”  I turned on my heel at once and left Zef to eat my dust.


I spent the next morning enjoying my day off in my blossoming fruit and vegetable garden.

Adoria in her garden

Zef and Ibbie were gone the entire day, so I didn’t need to worry about Zef cornering me and demanding to know what I’d been talking about the night before. For that, at least, I was grateful..


One Response to “To The Bitter End, Part 6”

  1. There is a lot going on here. Adoria is eaten up by anger at Zef’s constant understatement and denial of her true feelings for him. Also, he does not inquire at all about her health when she tells him there are problems… I must say, I start to like him less and less. He is so shallow! How could she have thought he was a friend?

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